quiver in thin streaks
of bright tinfoil
on mobile jet:
pale flounder
waver by
tilting silver:
in the shallows
agile minnows
flicker gilt:
grapeblue mussels
dilate lithe and
pliant valves:
dull lunar globes
of blubous jellyfish
glow milkgreen:
eels twirl
in wily spirals
on elusive tails:
adroir lobsters
amble darkly olive
on shrewd claws:
down where sound
comes blunt and wan
like the bronze tone
of a sunken gong."
2021/10
i like to listen to my boyfriend sleeping.
the quiet breathing and the occasional snore. the sound of the sheets rubbing together.
i want to look at his sleeping face. it's funny to see him sleeping like a puppy, when last night he was chattering away. but there's something so beautiful about it that makes me want to laugh a little, and i always want to record that.
2021/10
feeling is much, much more important than knowledge.
i've been ruminating on this a lot and it feels really good to me now. i want to take care of my knowledge and my senses. what we need is not to look at one part of a thing and judge it.
i would like to think that this was all necessary time.
2021/10
by the way, what's the story?
i watched my fingers as they glided.
small, white fingers tapping lightly against the black and white pieces of wood. it was quick, stumbling, uncomplicated, but somehow very comforting, lulling me to sleep with a light breeze coming in through the window. my eyelids clenched in a strange rivalry, not to be outdone here. but the gentle caresses on my cheeks dissolve my rigid thoughts and finally push me back to my dream with a thump. my vision is dry.
but it's nothing, it's just my contact lenses sticking in my eyes and drawing out the moisture, that's all.
it's all I can think of in my blurry, dreamy mind. i sneeze deeply to rehydrate my eyes, then look around slowly. the owner of the noise had left before i knew it and i was left in a room with very little luggage.
the room was dimly lit and the orange colour was slowly creeping in. i remembered, with a completely lucid mind, that there was something i wanted to talk to you about. i hesitated to say "hey" because i was sure that the imperfect music was dancing merrily. i nodded to myself and left the room.
2021/10
2021/10
i awoke to the sound of incessant rain.
listening to the silence, my foggy thoughts are even cloudier.
my blanket is light and thin, but somehow seems to be covered with moisture. i pull my blanket up to cover my head and feel like i am falling into the depths
of the ocean.
i don't want to leave the house.
i have had many rainy days like this in my life and i am tired of not knowing what to do.
i like the colour of the rain, the sound, the air. i think it has a certain charm. but in contrast, my heart is sinking. what is the meaning of this?
i can't understand why, which makes me even more frustrated. i don't want to show my imperfect self (i've never been perfect), but i'm losing control and looking at myself in the mirror with empty eyes.
my ears were ringing. it's getting louder and louder, drowning out the sound of the rain.
outside the cloudy window, there were people working on some construction project. i look outside the cloudy window and think to myself: "i need to go." reluctantly, i put on my clothes and put on my shoes. i couldn't tell you how much i wanted a hug, so i wrapped myself in my own arms.
i was reluctant to leave until the end and after closing the door of my house, i was so sorry that i revealed my most incomprehensible feelings.
